A few "icks" I have about Birth Working

 I'm still new to the world of birth working and I'm loving all that I'm learning and the many opportunities to grow and empower myself as a doula. 

I can't help but to notice though that there are a lot of "icks" that new birth workers have to navigate in order to find their footing in this world. Especially Black birth workers. 

Here are just a few things that stand out to me.

- So many spaces dedicated to birth working involves New Ageism and witchcraft.

 I DO NOT want to do "birth magic" nor do I want to be classified as a bruja (witch in Spanish) in this space. Why can't birthing just be normalized? Why do we have to associate it with witching?

An interesting parallel that I draw from this is that the 'witch' paradigm surrounding birthing is not new. In fact, in the city that I am from, a major witch trial was held in the 1600s accusing a midwife of witchery. Since then, there has been a lot of confusion around the sacredness of birth working and many people have reduced the power of a woman's ability to bear life as simply being 'magic.' Oh mamas, we're so much more than that! While I'll agree that birthing is supernatural, it's only that way because the Holy Spirit is involved in this process. Imagine serving a God so great that at the beginning of time, He was the only creator. He eventually invited us into his space to be co-creators with Him and that is a marvelous, astonishing, and powerful thing! It's not magic or happenstance. It's the power of God!

- Many people will look down on your journey as a birth worker if you don't have children. 

There's a definite and overt undertone that many people project towards aspiring birth workers that don't have children. Yes, I'm a single woman and yes, I don't have children. Even before I got into birth working, I was a supporter of motherhood and even created an online space dedicated to women. I have gotten my fair share of comments from other women trying to change or correct my opinions of things pertaining to women and folks have even tried to dismiss my thoughts and truths with backhanded comments like "you'll change how you feel when you have children." Hey there, I don't have to have children to be able to utilize common sense, research and experience. 

- White spaces. Yeah, I wish I could leave it at that but, I must explain. 

The world of birth working, in many spaces, is whitewashed. I have researched dozens of doula organizations, communities, and spaces and what I've found is that most of them don't represent women that look like me and it's sad. Many of the women in these spaces are oblivious to the needs of mothers of color, and its honestly because they aren't women of color. I've personally heard of many horror stories from Black mamas trying to navigate the western (white) world of medicine. I've heard of Black mamas having CPS and the police called on them for simply admitting that they smoke weed, are feeling depressed, don't have a car, don't have support at home, are in domestic violence situations, etc. And these white doula spaces don't seem to be prepared to address the reality of situations like these.

I've heard of Black mamas being thrown out of practices, insulted, abused, forcefully confined, you name it - and this treatment stems from racial biases. In order for Black mothers to feel seen, heard, and supported in these spaces, there must be an effort to decolonize birthing spaces or at least create more of our own! For the record, I only work with mothers of color for this reason. I said what I said! 

- Ignorance. That's it.

There's still a lot of general ignorance around birthing and birth workers. People still confuse the role of a midwife and a doula, even doctors. Many people still believe that doulas are only for hippie mamas that eat grass and want unmedicated births. In fact, a lot of people still believe doulas and birth workers are agents of alternative medicine and culture. Nope, many doulas support mamas through medicated births and even C-sections. Doulas don't have to be rebellious and defiant enemies of the medical world. We're here to support our mamas in whatever route they choose to birth their babies, whether that be medicated or unmedicated. Doulas can even be men!